As Seen on TV Sunglasses, 1990′s Style

On the first day of summer, we bring you an innovation in sun protection, “an important development that’s keeping pace with the changing look of the 1990′s.”  This “important development” was a veritable revolution, changing the way active, beautiful people protect their bright, beautiful eyes from harmful UV rays.  As you will see from the infomercial, influenced not only sun care and eye protection, but also fashion accessories for the following decades.

Or maybe not.

Behold the Digi Sportlens:

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8odl5Z874e8

According to the Digi Sportlens commercial, prior to the 1990′s, the sun’s rays were not harmful.  It was perfectly safe to sunbathe, tan, and otherwise bask in the sun’s rays without protection.  That’s why all those prairie farm girls wore bonnets and why the brims of cowboy hats are so wide–because WHO KNEW that sun could be damaging?

The beach-strolling pitch-couple warns that the 1990′s sun is more menacing than the “kinder, gentler” sun of previous eras due to the CFC’s that damaged the ozone layer.  Such a vitriolic sun could only be defeated by a technological breakthrough:  The Giant Visor Sunglasses Combo.

Perhaps the infomercial tactic of threatening people with imminent doom from a corroding ozone layer was not the best approach, because further Digi Sportlens commercials added emphasis to the fashionable nature of the beast:

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EaZNbReRAD8

That’s right, folks.  The Digi Sportlens is a “state-of-the-art modular system that conforms to the contours of your face.”  (And ohmygoodness, don’t you just love that guy’s shirt?!)  In this version of the infomercial, beautiful, big haired, bathing beauties parade around in their oh-so-stylish Digi Sportlens visors.

By the sheer number of Digi Sportlens rip-offs we still see today (approximately zero by my last count), we can clearly see that this trend took off like . . . fanny packs.

One thing they did get right, and that is that savvy consumers know that the sun’s rays are damaging, particularly to the eyes and the delicate skin around the eyes.  However, people aren’t willing to sacrifice style by wearing ginormous visor glasses.  As Seen On TV sunglasses like the HD Vision Aviators and Eagle Eyes Sunglasses offer superior sun protection, visual clarity, and stylish frames.

Because even if you are built like a brick house, Digi Sportlens is still going to make you look like a raging goofball.

Stop “Mom, I’m Bored” with These As Seen on TV Toys and Games

Summer has finally arrived in full force, which means the kids are at home and the novelty of the first couple of weeks of freedom from school has worn off.  Cheers and laughter have been replaced by whines of “Mom, I’m bored!”  As heat reaches triple digits in some parts of the nation, the temperature outside is not the only thing approaching its boiling point.  Playing referee between squabbling kids and serving as entertainment coordinator for a pack of miniature hooligans has mom needing a break, too.

How do you keep your cool among soaring temperatures and soaring tempers?  With As Seen on TV games and toys, of course!  Infomercial toys are unique products that will entertain your kids and visiting neighbor kids who infiltrate your home, depleting it of snacks and leaving a path of destruction in your living room.  These innovative toys and games will capture the attention and imagination of children.  When doled out at intervals throughout the summer, these As Seen on TV toys will all but eliminate the summertime boredom refrain.  Below, we highlight some of our favorite picks for summertime fun.

As Seen on TV Toys to Beat the Heat

1. Big Squirt Water Toy – Spraying each other with water is the classic way to keep cool in the summer heat.  Big Squirt’s jet action allows users to squirt water up to 3o feet.  With sets ranging in size from 5 water toys to 250 water toys, you can entertain your own kids or the entire neighborhood.  Most importantly, you can keep them in your yard and out of your house.
2. Rocket Balloons – These As Seen on TV toys will get your kids outside as they race balloons and try to see whose Rocket Balloon can soar the highest, launch the farthest, or fly the fastest.  Great for outdoor use, Rocket Balloons are also safe for indoor use on days it’s just too hot to go out and play.
3. Dotza, Sprayza, Fuzzoodle, Glow Crazy, and other As Seen on TV arts and crafts – Let’s face it.  In the dog days of summer, going outside to play is just not an option.  The heat can be downright miserable and even dangerous, but with the kids in the house, everyone needs a little air-conditioned downtime.  Take a break and sip some cold iced tea while the kids quietly create one-of-a-kind art projects with unique markers like Dotza, glow-in-the-dark drawings with Glow Crazy, fuzzy bendable noodle creatures with Fuzzoodle, or kid-powered airbrush masterpieces with Sprayza.
4. Happy Nappers Play Pillow – No summer day is complete without a well-timed nap after a day of fun.  Make the transition from play time to rest time easy with the Happy Nappers Play Pillow.  Happy Nappers start as a pillow shaped like a pet’s home, but unzip to a cuddly animal friend.

All of these As Seen on TV toys and games can be purchased from your computer on SeenOnTVExpress.com and delivered right to your door, saving you from strapping the kids in the minivan and heading to the mall, with hoardes of other harried moms looking for air conditioned comfort.

With As Seen on TV toys from SeenOnTV Express, you really will be the coolest mom on the block.

Eighties Technology in Infomercial Electronics

The 1980′s brought about some huge technological breakthroughs, the evolution of which shaped the electronics that have become so ubiquitous today.  Consider:

The Mobile Phone:

Portable Music Players:

Data Storage:

Home Computers:

Video Gaming:

Home Theater:

Whatever was Strong Enough to Make Her Hair Do This:

And, of course, the Invention that Allowed Chet and Gary to Put Bras on Their Heads and Turn a Barbie Doll into Kelly LeBrock:

All grand technological inventions, no?  But none, perhaps, surpasses this legendary As Seen on TV electronics innovation:  The Calculator Watch.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tUqyime4WTY

Not just a technological breakthrough, but a fashion statement as well.  Form and function combine into one amazing infomercial product that appealed to nerds everywhere.  According to the Calculator Watch infomercial, the watch has 21 phenomenal features–three of which are the ability to DISPLAY TIME, and one of which is the price, which is . . . not a feature.

For most of the aforementioned 1980′s technology, the successors are fairly evident.  Cell phones and home computers are still around, but they are much much smaller and have infinitely increased capabilities.  Data storage has dramatically decreased in physical size while voluminously increasing storage capability.  VCR, VHS, and BetaMax gave way to DVD players, TiVO, and Vide0-on-Demand.

But what about the Calculator Watch?  What would you say is its modern counterpart?

Life Mimics Art, and As Seen On TV Exercise Products are No Exception

Strangely shaped walking shoes designed to shape and firm your derriere have recently become quite popular.  On one hand, I’m intrigued, because anything that will give me a workout without me having to, you know, work out sounds a-okay to me.  On the other hand, I think these shoes with the bulky, curved soles look flat ridiculous.  Whenever I see them, I can’t help but think of the old Seinfeld episode, “The Jimmy.”

In “The Jimmy,” George and Jerry befriend Jimmy who wears special shoes that are supposed to help him jump higher.  Somehow, Kramer ends up wearing the shoes, and yada, yada, yada . . . Mel Torme thinks he’s mentally challenged.

This is what Jimmy’s shoes look like:

As much as I think the new shape-up, toning shoes look ridiculous and make me think of Jimmy’s shoes, I found As Seen On TV exercise equipment from the 1980′s and 1990′s that out-jimmies Jimmy.

Enter the Exerlopers:

The spring-soled Exerlopers are designed to:

• Reduce shock to the joints associated with running
• Maximize your workout by adding varied motion to your running
• Increase your speed and your vertical leap with spring supported action
• Make you look like a complete fool

Exerlopers were developed in the mid-1980′s by Canadian inventor Gregory Lekhtman, and enjoyed celebrity fame in 1993 when Lekhtman’s girlfriend, then-Canadian Prime Minister Kim Campbell, was seen wearing Exerlopers as she exercised.

Exerlopers are still available today, and you can even adapt them for an at-home workout using Insta-Runner.  According to the Exerlopers website, Insta-Runner is a “unique collapsible running stand which provides a workout for the upper and lower body.”  The handlebars on the Insta-Runner swivel to provide upper body resistance while you run in place wearing your Exerlopers.

As Seen on TV Exercise Equipment for Multi-Taskers

The idea behind Exerlopers is sound exercise advice.  Why simply run when you can run AND jump at the same time?  Why do cardio alone when you can combine cardio and strength training in one workout?  People want maximum results in minimum time, and infomercial exercise videos and equipment that allow you to combine effective fitness routines are among the most popular As Seen On TV products available.

The Bowflex Treadclimber combines the motion of a stairclimber, a treadmill, and an elliptical trainer to amplify fat-burning cardio.  FlexShaper is designed to combine resistance training with aerobic exercise for simultaneous toning and fat burning.

Products using Electrical Muscle Stimulation (EMS), like the FlexBelt ab belt or the FlexMini butt and thigh toner, let you discreetly work out your abs or lower body as you go about your daily business.

Of course, if modesty is not important when it comes to your As Seen On TV exercise routine (you’re not still wearing spandex pants, are you?) then Exerlopers are, er, leaps and bounds beyond discretion.