Posted by Nicci | Posted in Kitchen Products | Posted on 28-06-2012
Tags: As Seen On TV, Gyro Bowl, Infomercials
If you have been reading the SeenOnTVExpress blog for any length of time, you know I’m not above a little snark when a particular product strikes me as frivolous, silly, outdated, or just plain weird. However, I recently stumbled across another As Seen On TV blog that was ridiculing a new product that, well, frankly, I think is genius. It is clear that the writer of the other blog does not have any small children in his or her home, or instead of sniping about the product, he/she would be ordering that puppy NOW.
The product in question is the Dog Dicer, and I think it ranks right up there in brilliance with the Disney Gyro Bowl–you know, the bowl that will not spill no matter how amped up your kid may be on Pop Rocks or Mountain Dew or whatever else grandma has been letting them have against your specific instructions. The Dog Dicer is a product that slices and halves a hot dog in one motion, like so:
Now, being well-versed in sarcasm and cynicism myself, I get the comments of the Clearly-Not-A-Parent-Blogger. Like, using a knife is soooo hard, right? I believe I may have even used that same line of logic on another hot dog-related product, myself (remember the Happy Hot Dog Man?). But here’s why the Dog Dicer is different and far above my usual snide comments: it saves time and makes safety almost idiot-proof.
As silly as it may sound to non-parental types, hot dogs are the leading cause of choking among kids. Pediatricians warn parent to cut up hot dogs to prevent choking, because the hot dog is the same circumference as a young child’s esophagus. There has even been proposed legislation to require changing the shape of hot dogs to prevent choking, because these windpipe-shaped sausages are practically the perfect storm of asphyxiation. However, far too often, I have seen well-meaning parents slice their kids’ hot dogs–leaving them with smaller pieces that are still the exact same circumference and shape as the whole hot dog. Hot dogs are supposed to be halved lengthwise prior to slicing to prevent choking. The Dog Dicer slices lengthwise and crosswise in one motion, ensuring that the hot dog is sliced into safely-shaped pieces.
Now, a knife is perfectly suited to the task, but it takes some time. When you’ve got a hungry and potentially cranky toddler waiting on a hot dog, everybody is happier if you get it to the table as quickly as possible. Plus, one thing any mom could use more of is time.
I’m not sure I would have rushed right out and bought a Dog Dicer, but when they showed it quartering grapes? Sold. Have you ever had to quarter grapes for a toddler? Those little suckers roll all over the place, and it takes forever. I nearly swooned with desire when I saw that lady line up ten or so grapes, press a lever, and gloriously reveal safely chopped grapes. Over the course of two to three years of lunches and snacks, can you imagine how much time you’d save on grapes alone? It’s magnificent, I tell you.
I guess the moral of my story is that As Seen On TV products are generally creative ways of problem solving. Even if a product may seem silly to you, Mr. Bachelor Infomercial Blogger, for someone out there, it is the perfect solution.*
*This in no way means I’m going to stop being snarky. I like to make rules that apply to other people–not to myself.