Ah, Thanksgiving.  A time of year to enjoy time with our families and to express gratitude for all of our blessings.  For most of us, that also means indulging in huge, home-cooked meals.  Unfortunately for some of us, our dreams of plump, moist turkey are shattered, and we must consume overcooked, dried turkey-jerky a la Clark Griswold instead.

(Note:  I wanted to include the clip of the holiday dinner scene from National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation, but I fear it would be a violation of copyright law.  Fortunately, fearless scofflaws have posted the video here for your viewing pleasure.)

Poor Clark.  At least his over-dry turkey was not a fire hazard.  Please note these videos of people who failed to heed our warnings last year, and who tried to cook Thanksgiving dinner without the safety and convenience of a Butterball Indoor Electric Turkey Fryer.

Exhibit A:  Oven Roasted Turkey Flambe

Exhibit B:  Archimedes Meets Turkey Frying

Lest you think these are isolated incidents, just head over to YouTube and search “exploding turkey” or “turkey fryer fire.”  Apparently, these incidents are so common that there are even public service announcements and fire department demonstrations to warn people about such fire hazards.

Two leading insurers have even based commercials around the catastrophe that is Holiday Cooking.  Allstate notes, “Trouble never takes a holiday,” with its smooth-voiced baritone spokesman standing by a turkey fryer.  State Farm went all out, hiring THE William Shatner to demonstrate proper turkey frying techniques:

Even AT&T was on the exploding turkey bandwagon with this commercial:

Seriously.  Are you getting the message yet?  Cooking is DANGEROUS.  Cooking turkey for Thanksgiving can threaten your life, your home, and your eyebrows.  If you can’t rely on an expert to cook your dinner for you, rely on a product designed by experts.  Check out innovative As Seen On TV kitchen products like the Butterball turkey fryer.  Click here to see the extensive collection in our SeenOnTV Express catalog.

One of the hallmarks of a good infomercial is an effective product demonstration.  Most people, before they are willing to buy a product, want to see how it works.  If an item is sold in stores, consumers may  have a chance to actually hold the product, look it over, and see if it fits their needs.  For infomercial products, however, consumers are limited to a two-dimensional representation of the item shown on their television screen.  To show how a product works and to illustrate its effectiveness, television marketers harken back to the days of street vendors in using product demonstrations to entice potential buyers.

After all, a pitchman could tell you his knives are amazingly sharp, but unless you see them in action, you are just taking his word for it.  Once you see how it can slice through metal and still be sharp enough for razor thin tomato slices, you will be convinced.  Former pitchman king Billy Mays could tell you that Kaboom! cleaner was the toughest, most effective household cleaner available, but until he showed you what it could do with a bathtub that looked like a crime scene, you had no reason to believe him.

After all, seeing is believing.

Of course, “seeing is believing” is only relevant to producing sales if the product demonstration actually works.  One of the problems with earlier As Seen On TV product demonstrations was that they occurred live before a studio audience.  If the product failed, or if the pitchman failed to appropriately use the  product, the whole demonstration became a fiasco.  Take this example of a home shopping demonstration gone horribly wrong:

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xgHZe1hraEU

You can actually see when this demonstration starts to head south, and yet the plucky pitchman continues on, risking life and limb to prove that the ladder actually DOES lock into place.  And yet, it doesn’t.

Fortunately for today’s pitchmen, many informercials are filmed in advance of airing and bloopers can be edited out or segments retaped for the perfect pitch.

The Tapout XT extreme home fitness program has become the latest among As Seen On TV exercise videos and equipment to be endorsed by mixed martial artists and MMA champions.  Products such as Tower 200, Jack Rack,  Rip:60, and Muscle Warfare have been endorsed by top MMA fighters including Randy Couture, Chuck Liddell, Georges St. Pierre, and Travis Limaure, respectively.  With the continued popularity of MMA, it is no surprise that celebrity endorsements from these athletes are among the hottest ways to sell As Seen On TV fitness equipment.

After all, athletes have been demonstrating the effectiveness of various workout programs, exercise equipment, and bodybuilding supplements for years.  If you want an athletic build, who better to ask than an admired and skilled athlete?  Finding an athlete or a sport whose popularity is at a peak is key to an effective endorsement.  For example, NFL defensive tackle Lyle Alzado demonstrated the effectiveness of weight training in his War with Weights program in 1984, only a year after helping to lead the L.A. Raiders to a Super Bowl victory:

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V9bPLaE5dE8

Though it would probably be difficult today to promote milk-jug-lifting as an effective workout, the point remains that athletes at the peak of their game are often the best candidates for endorsing any product associated with health, wellness, and fitness.  Tapout has made a name for itself as one of the top supporters of MMA athletes, and Tapout gear can be seen on both fighters and fans.  With the release of Tapout XT, the company embraces not only the popularity of MMA, but also the public demand for extreme, high-intensity workouts brought about by programs such as P90X.

Tapout XT includes twelve MMA-inspired workouts designed to get you hard-core results in as little as ninety days:

• Strength & Force
• Plyo XT
• Cross Core Combat
• Competition Core
• Buns & Guns XT
• Yoga XT
• Sprawl and Brawl
• Muay Thai
• Ripped Conditioning
• Ultimate Abs XT
• Cardio XT
• Legs & Back

The program also includes resistance bands, nutrition guide, 10-day slimdown plan, bonus training and abs DVDs, and other essentials to help you get a lean, sculpted fighter’s physique.

With the Olympics in full swing, look out for a surge in product endorsements by Olympic champions and gold medalists lending their fame to everything from cereal to cell phones.  Traditional advertising wisdom holds that “sex sells,” but with our athlete-obsessed culture, it is fair to say that sports sell, too.

Traditionally, As Seen On TV products were sold only through a toll-free phone number or a mail-order address.  If you remember the early days of infomercial marketing, you remember commercials that ended by emphasizing, “Call to order today at 1-800-555-1234.  Thaaaaat’s 1-800-555-1234.  1-800-555-1234.”  You had to act quickly to either call the number or grab a pen and jot it down before the commercial ended, and marketers knew they needed to repeat the number several times in order to give you the chance to order.  Now, the ways in which we buy infomercial products has changed.  Of course, you can still buy your products by calling the number on your screen, but you can also order online or pick up certain products in stores.  With several ordering options from which to choose, SeenOnTV Express offers you the top four reasons why you should buy As Seen On TV products online:

1.  Convenience:  In the early days of direct response television marketing, your choices for ordering included only telephone orders and mail orders.  While these two methods allowed a customer to order from the comfort of his or her own home, the customer still had to act quickly to write down the number or to order as the infomercial aired.  Action had to be swift or one might lose the opportunity to buy.  It deprived consumers of the opportunity to think about a product before buying, giving a sort of “now or never” approach to As Seen On TV shopping.  Since that time, some of these products have become available in stores, but ordering online is always more convenient than driving to the store and searching for a particular product that may or may not be on the shelves.  By ordering online, you can order the products you want whenever you want.

2.  Value:  When you purchase an infomercial product in stores, you do have the instant gratification of seeing the product you want and taking it home immediately.  However, you lose out on valuable offers you can get only when purchasing the product online or through the customer service phone number.  Buy one, get one free offers; bonus items; free gifts and accessories are almost always provided with online ordering.  Also, complementary items are often available as add-on purchases when ordering online, and these accessories and upgrades are generally not available in stores.

3.  Selection:  In most drug stores and discount stores, the selection of As Seen On TV products is limited to a single shelving bay or end cap.  Often, this means the store offers approximately 10-20 products.  As an online infomercial superstore, SeenOnTV Express offers a catalog of hundreds of products, including the most recent products to hit the market.  By ordering online, you have access to one-stop shopping, items that aren’t available in stores, and even new products you may not have seen advertised yet.  With everything from kitchenware to clothing, toys to tools, an online source for infomercial products can give you 24/7 access to a seemingly limitless array of items.

4.  Comparison:  With an expansive selection of items, an online As Seen On TV store can allow you to compare similar items to see which best suits your needs.  Do you need the Shark Professional Steam Pocket Mop or the One Touch Steam Tornado?  Which oven will work best for your kitchen:  the Halo Oven, the Nuwaveoven Pro, the Sharper Image Super Wave Oven, the Secura Turbo Oven, or the Big Boss Rapid Wave Oven?  Online shopping allows you to read descriptions of similar products and determine which is the right product for you.  It allows you the time to think about your options and make wise purchasing decisions.

Thousands of consumers prefer online shopping to purchase the things they need and want.  With the online marketplace offering convenience and service for savvy shoppers, it makes sense that shopping online would become the preferred method of buying infomercial products and more.    For convenience, value, selection, and more, visit SeenOnTV Express for all of your As Seen On TV shopping needs.

On the Fourth of July, the citizens of the United States of America celebrate Independence Day, commemorating the signing of the Declaration of Independence in 1776.  Though many people celebrate with bottle rockets and barbecues, virtually every American takes at least a moment to reflect on the strength of our nation and to honor the sacrifices of those who work to make our country great.

For many of us, a sense of pride in our country is not something that should be exhibited only once each year.  During a time when American values are under attack and our nation is often divided by partisan politics, it is important to show a sense of unity and support for our country.  This election year, you are able to show support for our country despite divisive politics with We Are We the People apparel.

We Are We the People t-shirts, visors, and hats are nonpartisan American apparel commemorating the United States Constitution–the document that details the rights and liberties of the American people.  Available in patriotic red, white, and blue, the shirts and hats reflect the first words of the Constitution, “We the people,” indicating the power of democracy.

We Are We the People American apparel does more than just show your pride in the United States of America; it helps support those who have sacrificed to protect our liberties and our ideals.  A portion of each sale goes to The Wounded Warrior Project, an organization that helps wounded soldiers and their families after they return from conflict.

This Independence Day, SeenOnTV Express encourages you to celebrate responsibly and to remember the reason for our celebration.  Happy Fourth of July!

If you have been reading the SeenOnTVExpress blog for any length of time, you know I’m not above a little snark when a particular product strikes me as frivolous, silly, outdated, or just plain weird.  However, I recently stumbled across another As Seen On TV blog that was ridiculing a new product that, well, frankly, I think is genius.  It is clear that the writer of the other blog does not have any small children in his or her home, or instead of sniping about the product, he/she would be ordering that puppy NOW.

The product in question is the Dog Dicer, and I think it ranks right up there in brilliance with the Disney Gyro Bowl–you know, the bowl that will not spill no matter how amped up your kid may be on Pop Rocks or Mountain Dew or whatever else grandma has been letting them have against your specific instructions.  The Dog Dicer is a product that slices and halves a hot dog in one motion, like so:

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=67FZKukJ6v4

Now, being well-versed in sarcasm and cynicism myself, I get the comments of the Clearly-Not-A-Parent-Blogger.  Like, using a knife is soooo hard, right?  I believe I may have even used that same line of logic on another hot dog-related product, myself (remember the Happy Hot Dog Man?).  But here’s why the Dog Dicer is different and far above my usual snide comments:  it saves time and makes safety almost idiot-proof.

As silly as it may sound to non-parental types, hot dogs are the leading cause of choking among kids.  Pediatricians warn parent to cut up hot dogs to prevent choking, because the hot dog is the same circumference as a young child’s esophagus.  There has even been proposed legislation to require changing the shape of hot dogs to prevent choking, because these windpipe-shaped sausages are practically the perfect storm of asphyxiation.  However, far too often, I have seen well-meaning parents slice their kids’ hot dogs–leaving them with smaller pieces that are still the exact same circumference and shape as the whole hot dog.  Hot dogs are supposed to be halved lengthwise prior to slicing to prevent choking.  The Dog Dicer slices lengthwise and crosswise in one motion, ensuring that the hot dog is sliced into safely-shaped pieces.

Now, a knife is perfectly suited to the task, but it takes some time.  When you’ve got a hungry and potentially cranky toddler waiting on a hot dog, everybody is happier if you get it to the table as quickly as possible.  Plus, one thing any mom could use more of is time.

I’m not sure I would have rushed right out and bought a Dog Dicer, but when they showed it quartering grapes?  Sold.  Have you ever had to quarter grapes for a toddler?  Those little suckers roll all over the place, and it takes forever.  I nearly swooned with desire when I saw that lady line up ten or so grapes, press a lever, and gloriously reveal safely chopped grapes.  Over the course of two to three years of lunches and snacks, can you imagine how much time you’d save on grapes alone?  It’s magnificent, I tell you.

I guess the moral of my story is that As Seen On TV products are generally creative ways of problem solving.  Even if a product may seem silly to you, Mr. Bachelor Infomercial Blogger, for someone out there, it is the perfect solution.*

*This in no way means I’m going to stop being snarky.  I like to make rules that apply to other people–not to myself.

In the past, when the SeenOnTV Express blog has described an As Seen On TV product on our “Way Back Wednesday” feature, the tone of the article has frequently been a bit snarky.  I mean, let’s face it–some of those early ’80s infomercials  we originally featured were a bit ridiculous.  Today, however, I would like to pay homage to an earlier product that launched a new way to clean:  The Steam Buggy.  One of  the first products offered in our As Seen On TV catalog, the Steam Buggy was a portable steam cleaner that allowed users to clean and sanitize hard-to-clean areas throughout their homes.  It was one of the first products to bring the professional power of steam cleaning right into your home, and since its introduction, steam mops and other steam cleaners have become common ways to powerfully and effectively clean floors, kitchens, bathrooms, and more.

So what is it that has brought about my new-found admiration for steam cleaning?  Having a three-and-a-half-year-old dinner companion leaves my kitchen floor in need of a Hazmat crew after every meal.  Ever since we introduced solid food roughly three years ago, we have been sweeping, wiping, mopping, and chiseling food from our lovely cream-colored tile.  Dealing with the kitchen floor seems as unending and relentless as laundry.  I would sooner try to sweep the sand from the Sahara as attempt to maintain a clean kitchen floor.

We currently have four rotating methods for cleaning our kitchen floor:

• Fastidiously wipe up any spills, vacuum any messes, and sweep or mop the offending area after each meal.
• Give the kitchen floor a quick clean-up at the end of each day.
• Clean up the big, gross spots ASAP, but save the mopping for a weekly chore.
• Ignore it and hope the Mop Fairy makes a surprise visit before the grime on the floor petrifies and becomes a permanent pattern on the tile.

None of these methods are particularly effective for our family.  The first takes too much time.  The second is also pretty time consuming and also doesn’t get the floor as clean as I would like.  The third leaves me cringing every time I walk through the kitchen until Mop Day.  And the fourth?  Well, that’s just gross, and apparently, the Mop Fairy is on strike.

Because none of our floor cleaning methods are able to sufficiently battle a preschooler at mealtime, I’ve been looking for a quick and easy way to really, thoroughly clean the floor without spending too much time behind a broomstick.  I have really been considering a steam cleaner to power away the stuck-on foods and to sanitize the floors–particularly since we will be adding another little mealtime terror to the mix in just a few months, one who will be crawling on the very floors in question.

Though the Steam Buggy served its purpose, I’m looking for something a little more conducive to cleaning an entire floor.  Today’s As Seen On TV steam mops seem to fit the bill.  Two products in particular have caught my eye:  the One Touch Steam Tornado and the Shark Professional Steam Pocket Mop.  Both of these steam cleaners are lightweight and feature an upright design.  The Shark Pro Steamer has the look of typical sweeper mops, but provides three levels of steam control, reusable cleaning cloths, shaped cleaning heads, and a carpet glider head for carpet cleaning.  The One Touch Steam Tornado can be used as an upright or handheld device for cleaning virtually anywhere and also features washable, reusable microfiber cleaning pads.

Finally, getting steamed over our kitchen floors is a good thing.

Now that spring is turning to summer across the nation, your landscaping has probably moved beyond planting and cultivating to maintaining and manicuring.  Mowing the lawn and trimming your hedges are necessary to keep your lawn, flowerbeds, and shrubs looking great throughout the season.  As always, As Seen On TV lawn and garden products can make your yard work quicker, easier, neater, and even greener.

For mowing your lawn, try the Greenworks mower.  This 3-in-1 electric mower lets you beautify your yard in an earth-friendly way by reducing your carbon footprint.  Just because the Greenworks electric mower is eco-conscious, though, does not mean it lacks power.  With a 19-inch cutting path, 40V rechargeable lithium-ion battery, and an Energy Star rated battery charger, the Greenworks mower is a great choice for those who do not want to sacrifice the environment or the power in their power tools.

Speaking of power, the Garden Groom hedge trimmer has the power to clip, shred, and collect trimmings in one compact portable trimmer.  The Garden Groom is ultra-lightweight, easy-to-handle, and features a “goof-proof” design so that anyone can get professional results.  Not only does Garden Groom clip and shred, but its vacuum vortex pulls the trimmings into the collection bin for mess-free use.  Simply empty the trimmings onto your mulch or compost pile, or dump them straight into the trash.  The Garden Groom hedge trimmer has a powerful 300-watt motor to trim easily, but also features a covered trimming blade for unmatched safety.

Whether planting or caring for your lawn or garden, infomercial products offer innovations that make any task easier.  From beautiful, hardy grasses, plants, and flowers to tools and products to make every job simpler and more convenient, the As Seen On TV garden department at Seen On TV Express has everything to make your lawn and garden stunning.  Order today to take advantage of special offers, buy one get one free pricing, and satisfaction guarantees on many of the garden products offered in our online  As Seen On TV store.

Today’s fashions change so quickly, it is almost impossible to keep up.  Some styles seem to last only about as long as a Kardashian marriage.  Trying to keep up with the trends can be extremely expensive.  Luckily, As Seen On TV clothing and accessories take the hottest styles and make them affordable and offer easy solutions for updating your wardrobe without having to replace it.

One of my favorite new infomercial products for fashion is Covfurs.  Covfurs are faux fur slipcovers for boots.  These faux fur boot wraps can instantly update your existing boots at just a fraction of the cost of a new pair of boots.  Let’s say you have a pair of last year’s plain black leather boots, but you really want to sport that trendy fur boot look.  One leading online shoe retailer lists a pair of name brand “Mongolian Hair Boots” for $175.   You could pay that for a single pair of boots, or you could buy a pair of Covfurs boot covers for less than $40.  Wear them with high-heeled boots or flat boots; wear them tall or slouched.  That’s four looks about the quarter of the price of one pair of boots.  At such a great value, you could even buy all three colors of Covfurs:  Elegant Black, Brown Chinchilla, and Wild Leopard.  For less than the cost of one pair of fur boots, you could get up to twelve great looks from Covfurs.

Speaking of getting multiple looks from one great piece, Shamina bills itself as the “Shawl that Does it All.”  This unique shawl features snaps to help it stay put, unlike traditional shawls and wraps that slip off your shoulders.  Because of Shamina’s innovative design, this one beautiful accessory can be worn several different ways:

• Shawl
• Pashmina
• Wrap
• Scarf
• Sarong

Update a simple black dress, or create a sophisticated look from a casual outfit.  Because it is lightweight and wrinkle-free, you can easily take Shamina with you wherever you go–it even fits in your purse.

Shamina and Covfurs let you update your style with an easy accessory, but other As Seen On TV accessories can help you change your look discreetly.  I don’t know about you, but I get easily frustrated when I have to buy forty gazillion pairs of pants to wear with my forty gazillion pairs of shoes.  I don’t want to have to wear stilettos just because a particular pair of pants is long, and I don’t want to have to wear flats just because another pair of pants is shorter.  I love the inventor of Style Snaps, who solved this problem once and for all.  Style Snaps allow you to instantly hem your pants without ironing, without gluing, and without sewing.  These removable adhesive snaps let you quickly and easily shorten any hem–then let it out again when you need the length.  Great for pants and skirts, Style Snaps keep your hemlines appropriate for the occasion and for the shoes with no commitment.

No commitment?  Sounds perfect for Kim Kardashian.

Some time ago, we at Seen On TV Express wrote about getting an early start on your lawn and landscaping by taking advantage of several As Seen On TV offers.  If you didn’t listen to us then, we have a feeling that looking at your neighbors lush green grass and vibrant flower beds is making you feel just a teeny bit inferior.  We are not going to say, “We told you so”–we are much bigger and more magnanimous than that (as you can tell by our use of the “Royal We” and really big words like “magnanimous”).  Instead, we are going to give you another chance to get your lawn in gorgeous shape that will leave your neighbors (ahem) green with envy.

QuickLawn by Gardener’s Choice is a top selling As Seen On TV grass seed for quickly growing a beautiful, resilient lawn.  Developed by scientists, Quick Lawn is designed to be a four-season, evergreen grass that starts growing in as little as one week.  This university-developed turf grass is engineered to sprout quickly, filling in bare spots and keeping your lawn green throughout the year. To use QuickLawn grass seed, simply seed your yard and water.

Benefits of QuickLawn include:

• Grows in even clay soil or sandy soil
• Withstands both sun and shade
• Resilient in heavy traffic areas
• Resistant to disease and insects
• Multiplies rapidly
• Fills in bare spots and chokes out weeds
• 2 pounds of seed covers approximately 1,000 square feet
• Velvety, evergreen lawn all year long–even in snow!

In our part of the country, we are having one of the greenest Springs in recent memory.  Often, we are plagued with drought from late spring through fall.  With red clay soil, our lawns are often brown and crunchy.  This year, the rain and mild temperatures have created a lush and lovely Spring.  In our own yard, that translated to Really Big Weeds, which, once destroyed, left Really Big Brown Spots.  Quick Lawn may just be our answer to filling in the gaps and creating a beautiful, soft lawn that can withstand the poor soil and scorching heat of our summers.

Where will you use QuickLawn?